I love listening to Toy Robbins speak and hope one day to hear him in person. He talks with clarity and purpose about how we can unlock our abilities and smash through roadblocks to reach our goals. His compassion always strikes me along with a genuine understanding of the pain many of us feel.

One of my favourite things he says is, “All of us in life have things we want, but we don’t get what we want, we get what we have to have!”

Ambition rarely comes from a warm and cosy place in our hearts. In comes from the pit of our stomach. From deep inside us and is forged in times of pain and hurt. There is nothing particularly wrong about this; I treat it as a reality of the human condition.

We might say, the greater the pain, the greater the desire to for change or similarly in the words of Lance Armstrong, “All endurance athletes are running away from something.”

Returning to Tony Robbins, his words often get to the heart of what it’s like to have ambitions, to want success, to dream big and have goals. Somehow, he makes me believe that it’s ok to feel like this and not something to hide or be embarrassed about. While at the same time, he helps me remember that wanting it isn’t enough and dreaming about it isn’t enough.

Fulfilment of your dreams only comes when you take action to make them a reality. You must channel the pain and hurt you feel in a positive direction. You must use this power to give you the strength to move forward. It’s not easy, often we walk a tightrope between positive motivation and being overwhelmed by fear and the negative feelings brought on by pain.

I have spent more than twenty years walking on the wrong side of this pathway. A year ago, I discovered that small, positive, daily habits, pursued quietly day after day, were the secret to overcoming the pain. These habits were the secret to smashing through roadblocks, and most amazingly, they were the secret to fulfilling my dreams. I hope you will make this same discovery.

Together, we climb the mountain, not in giant leaps but one small step at a time.