Worry
Yesterday, I moved the caravan from Sudeley Castle to Badminton Horse Trials. This morning, I’m looking out over the beautiful Gloucestershire countryside under a crystal-clear blue sky. I love days like this; they remind me how much I enjoy the show lifestyle. It certainly isn’t for everyone; Justina hates the constant moving around. I guess I must have some gipsy blood in me somewhere!
Outside the caravan, a Jack Russel is charging after a ball its owner is throwing for him. I’m struck by the carefree nature of the dog. He worries about nothing beyond fetching the ball. My sister has one too, and I know from personal experience that he can play this game all day!
Worry is a strange emotion; sapping our will and making life feel so heavy. I think we only become aware of how damaging and debilitating it is when it’s gone. There is a sudden release, a newfound sense of freedom, liberation and optimism.
I have just experienced this first hand, with some staffing issues on our show stand. It has been causing me a lot of stress and worry over the last month or so. The situation has been nagging away, weighing me down and I have been agonising over it. This situation has a knock-on effect on my mood and my interaction with my other staff. They feel my bad mood, and it affects them too.
The situation came to a head over the weekend, and I finally acted to resolve the situation. I spoke to a friend the next day; she asked if I felt angry and I replied no I felt unbelievably happy that the worry had gone away. I could literally feel the weight being removed from my shoulders. It was a mixture of relief and returning excitement for the job in hand.
Have you experienced this too? Are you finding your enthusiasm is waning for a project? It could be that you are worried about something and this is affecting your mental state like me.
When you are worried about something, it grows and festers like cancer. The only way to resolve it is to act, and this can feel unbelievably hard. Forcing yourself to take ownership of the problem, then doing something about it will put you on the pathway to ending the worry.
The first step is to write down what you are worrying about. If you can clearly articulate what the problem is, then you can think through a plan. Finally, and this is the most important step, take action. Force yourself to make a decision, who knows if it’s the right one; I believe it often doesn’t matter if its right or wrong. Just getting moving forward again is the most important thing.
Remember, we climb the mountain, not in giant leaps but one small step at a time.